Angelic Confesssions

Home site of Author Jan Marie's Angelic Confessions

Exclusive Excerpt From Angelic Confessions

 

 



 

   

Soon my studies started as I was to learn the history, and etiquette in how to be a proper angel. I obeyed Father totally and completely without thought: he was Father. I had my growing fascination with the humans which Father humored letting me look down on them as a reward at the end of lessons. I particularly liked watching the children.
 “Can I play with them Father?” I asked.
“I am sorry Aye you can not. You must stay here at home with me.” My heart saddened as I started to feel tears well up.
“Would you like to go into the gardens and see the animals next?”
“Animals?” I said looking up at him with interest as I wiped my budding tears away. Father smiled I’m sure that he had managed to stop an onslaught of tears as he took my hand, and we went to see the animals next. I knew that Father’s wish was for me was to be happy, and I was. Except I  heard the hushed toned  whispers that the others whispered about me when I walked down the marbled halls with Father. “Did you hear?”
“She had our Lord under her spell!”
“I heard she could kill us all.”
What did all that mean? Was there something wrong with me?  I knew I was to never leave the tower, and I never really interacted with anyone else, but Father and the red curls angel. My dreams were often dark too. In my dreams I stood in battlefield of dead angels. Broken wings, blood everywhere… and I liked it. I then shook these thoughts out of my head telling no one. 


*** *** ***
One day Father had cut our daily lessons short as he introduced me to his assistants. Father made sure I was dressed in my most presentable dress of white with a pink ribbon sash. I was always dressed secretly in a dress that had some sort of  pink or red color in it. This was to represent without uttering a word whom I secretly belonged to, and red was the color representation of my Mother who sat on the heavenly council. Father, and I walked down the grand marbled halls. As we passed the large arch windows the blue skies beckoned to me. I always wondered what lurked outside these marbled walls I always tied to. I was either close by Father’s side, or I was handed over to the angel with long red curls. I  wondered why I had to see her all the time. Father said she liked me, that I was special. It had been a long time since a young angel such as myself roamed the tower halls. This answer was not to my satisfactory, but I accepted it. If Father said to spend time with her I obeyed though a bit begrudgingly. Not that she was horrible. She was often kind letting me comb her long red curls and adorn them with white wild flowers that grew in the gardens. I came out of my thoughts as we approached a row of male angel’s line up in a row to greet us. They all bowed in unison as Father approached. It was then that one stepped forward, and knelt down on one knee before me. He smiled with his long straight hair that looked like ebony silk tied in a queue. His eyes were a pale autumn brown and amber. This was Uriel. 
“Hello it’s a pleasure to have a young one running around the tower again,” he said. 
“There will be no running,” Father boomed correcting him. I winced a bit knowing that correction was aimed at me. Next  was Raphael, who was to be my teacher; I was to become a healer like him. Raphael knelt down on one knee to me as well. He smiled with ambient joy in his eyes of aquamarine that sparkled brightly against his fair skin and pale blonde colored hair. “Hello Princess, are you not sweetly beautiful? Father’s definitely going to have to keep an eye on you,” he winked. Uriel elbowed Raphael in the head. “Ow! What?” Raphael said looking up at Uriel. I giggled finding their banter funny. Last was Michael who was breathtakingly beautiful with his long wavy dark brown hair. He bowed to me formally as he then  looked up at me with his eyes of blue specked with gold. I was entranced in their beauty as he spoke. 
“It is a pleasure little miss,” he smiled. “We’ll have fun don’t worry,” he winked as Father broke the entrancement with saying there was Gabriel who was away at the time and I would meet him soon. I curtseyed saying it was nice to meet them all. Father and I then departed from them, as we continued on with our day. After my nourishment break Father then took me to one of the many lush green gardens. When we entered I saw Uriel was standing with another under a large oak tree that was in the center of the gardens. The two looked like tall statues of night and day standing there. Uriel with his black, silken hair and the other with his flowing white blonde locks. They had been conversing when they caught sight of me and Father. They both stopped and bowed to their Lord as we then approached them. I then saw the white blonde haired angel glance at me then quickly look away like it pained him to even look at me. This was Gabriel, and I confirmed quickly in my mind that Gabriel did not like me. What I did not know was that Gabriel was close to my mother and knew the violence behind my creation. Father then stroked my hair as he told me he has some business to discuss with Gabriel, and that Uriel would watch over me till he return. I nodded as watched them leave.  
“Come, little one, would you like to hear a story?” Uriel said. I looked up to Uriel as tears started to well in my eyes. Uriel came closer to embrace me in his arms. “My, my what is wrong?”
“Father…”
“Your Father is an important man and sometimes he can not take you everywhere, and my has our Lord spoiled you.” I pulled away from him wiping away my budding tears with the back of my hand. 
“ So would you like to hear a story?” Uriel asked again with a smile. I nodded as he took my hand. We found a lovely spot under the large oak tree. “You know about the human’s right?” Uriel asked like he was testing me. 
“Yes, Father showed me them.”
“They are quite fascinating hmm?”
I looked down coyly playing with the hem of my dress. “A bit…” I said as I felt Uriel  brush my hair back. He then whispered in my ear as I suddenly froze. Flashes of clashing swords, then slaughtered angels crossed my vision. 
“Aye?” I blinked coming out of my vision surprised to see Father had returned for me. “Father!” I smiled as I rose up to embrace him. 
“Oh you missed me so much, was Uriel that bad? “No,” I said looking up at Father's adoring face. I turned to Uriel. “Thank you, Uriel; I enjoyed my time with you.” 
 “It’s been my pleasure dear,” he said as he rose to his feet. He then nodded his head to Father. “It is done my Lord.” Father then reached out to Uriel gripping him on the shoulder. “Thank you Uriel.” Father said. I wondered what that was about when Father then looked down at me and smiled brightly. “Care to accompany me on the rest of my daily duties my lady?” 
I curtsied formally to him. “It be my pleasure my Lord.”
Father chuckled. “Very nice.” I looked up at him and smiled proudly. That was all I wanted was Father to be proud of me. His approval was everything to me. I accompanied Father on his duties once again as we walked down the large marbled halls. We paused as we reached some stairs that lead down. I froze knowing I was to never leave this level of the tower. Why I was never allowed to leave this level of the tower I did not know. I often wondered what existed outside these walls.  Father must have sensed  my nervousness as I heard his chuckle. “It is okay,” Father said giving my hand a squeeze. “As long as I am with you this is okay.” I looked up at Father unsure, but he just smiled as gave my hand another 
squeeze as we headed down the stairs. We reached the bottom level, and continued our walk down the now grey stone corridor. The lower levels of the tower were not as greatly crafted as the upper levels that were of shiny marble stone. We then came to the end of the hall which opened up onto what were the guards training grounds. The grounds spilled out like a round forest arena. This was where Father’s soldiers trained and spared with each other. I watched these angels as they spared with the clank of their swords, metal against metal till something caught my eye as I saw three strangely dressed male angels striding towards us. Known as Father’s Elite Guards they were dressed quite differently from the traditional robes. They wore black high collared Asian style tunics that were trimmed in gold along the edges of their tunic. A black belt cinched at their waists as they wore black leg coverings, and shiny black boots. One was fair blonde, the other had copper colored curly locks, and the last had dark ebony hair. They all had their hair length groomed handsomely short too which was unique for an angel as well. They stopped in front of us as all three bowed. I attached myself to Father’s side hiding behind his robes as the dark haired one looked up and spoke. 
“Your orders have been fulfilled my Lord,” 
“Thank you Pio we can discuss this further when a certain young lady is not present.” I looked up at Father concerned, was I in his way? Father just smiled down at me as he stroked my hair soothing me to know everything was alright. “This is my newest by the way.”
“A little attached my Lord?” The blonde one said, looking up with a slight smirk. 
“Yes indeed and I of her,” Father chuckled. I saw the dark-haired one Father called Pio come over as he knelt down to me. “I’m Pio, nice to meet you,” he smiled as he offered his hand. I looked at him, wide-eyed as he actually spoke to me sincerely! He was not obligated like the others to introduce himself  to me. I then heard Father clear his throat as I let go of his side, and did the proper lady thing. I curtsied to him. “Such a proper Princess,” he smiled.
“I am NOT!” I scoffed and kicked his shin.  I cringed as I felt Father's hands come crashing down on my shoulders tightly. I was in for it now.
“It’s okay,” Pio said rubbing his shin, with a slight grimace on his face. 
“Yeah, Pio has that effect on the females,” grinned the copper-haired one. 
Pio glared back at him, “Shut up!” 
 I then threw myself into his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck. I felt him stiffen a bit; I knew I surprised him…in fact I surprised us both with this bold action of mine. “I’m Sorry!” I cried as I buried my face in his neck to stop the tears I felt brewing. He unwrapped my arms from around him, but did not let go of my hands as he held them to his chest. “It's okay my lady,” he smiled gently as he then kissed my hands. “You’ll be hard to forget,” he winked then smiled again. I felt Father's hands on my shoulders again, softer this time.
“We should take our leave now, thank you all,” he said as he nodded to them. We then left retuning to our upper levels. I think it was determined by your rank which level of the tower you resided in. This was just my theory though as I wondered if I asked Father about my theory would he answer me? I knew he had to be upset with me. I do not know what came over me! I tried act like nothing happened.
“ Um… he was nice, Father.”
“Then why did you kick him, my daughter?” 
I winced, yep he was not happy. I bowed my head looking at the floor. 
“I don’t know…I… sometimes…well Raphael called me Princess.” 
“You need to control these outbursts of yours. A daughter of mine will not act out in such violence.”  
“Kill him!” 
  I gasped as a pain hit my chest. I fell to my hand and knees my heart pounding in my chest. 
 “Aye!” Father’s voice boomed as he shook me. I blinked , and everything was gone. “Did I do something wrong Father?” I asked wondering why Father had me in his grip so tight. Why did he look so worried? He just pulled me tight to him.  “Nothing I just love you my daughter, my sweet child.” I embraced Father back hoping to dismay the concern that was in his heart. To be honest though I was concerned as well. What was happening to me?

 “Can I play with them Father?” I asked.
“I am sorry Aye you can not. You must stay here at home with me.” My heart saddened as I started to feel tears well up.
“Would you like to go into the gardens and see the animals next?”
“Animals?” I said looking up at him with interest as I wiped my budding tears away. Father smiled I’m sure that he had managed to stop an onslaught of tears as he took my hand, and we went to see the animals next. I knew that Father’s wish was for me was to be happy, and I was. Except I  heard the hushed toned  whispers that the others whispered about me when I walked down the marbled halls with Father. “Did you hear?”
“She had our Lord under her spell!”
“I heard she could kill us all.”
What did all that mean? Was there something wrong with me?  I knew I was to never leave the tower, and I never really interacted with anyone else, but Father and the red curls angel. My dreams were often dark too. In my dreams I stood in battlefield of dead angels. Broken wings, blood everywhere… and I liked it. I then shook these thoughts out of my head telling no one. 


*** *** ***
One day Father had cut our daily lessons short as he introduced me to his assistants. Father made sure I was dressed in my most presentable dress of white with a pink ribbon sash. I was always dressed secretly in a dress that had some sort of  pink or red color in it. This was to represent without uttering a word whom I secretly belonged to, and red was the color representation of my Mother who sat on the heavenly council. Father, and I walked down the grand marbled halls. As we passed the large arch windows the blue skies beckoned to me. I always wondered what lurked outside these marbled walls I always tied to. I was either close by Father’s side, or I was handed over to the angel with long red curls. I  wondered why I had to see her all the time. Father said she liked me, that I was special. It had been a long time since a young angel such as myself roamed the tower halls. This answer was not to my satisfactory, but I accepted it. If Father said to spend time with her I obeyed though a bit begrudgingly. Not that she was horrible. She was often kind letting me comb her long red curls and adorn them with white wild flowers that grew in the gardens. I came out of my thoughts as we approached a row of male angel’s line up in a row to greet us. They all bowed in unison as Father approached. It was then that one stepped forward, and knelt down on one knee before me. He smiled with his long straight hair that looked like ebony silk tied in a queue. His eyes were a pale autumn brown and amber. This was Uriel. 
“Hello it’s a pleasure to have a young one running around the tower again,” he said. 
“There will be no running,” Father boomed correcting him. I winced a bit knowing that correction was aimed at me. Next  was Raphael, who was to be my teacher; I was to become a healer like him. Raphael knelt down on one knee to me as well. He smiled with ambient joy in his eyes of aquamarine that sparkled brightly against his fair skin and pale blonde colored hair. “Hello Princess, are you not sweetly beautiful? Father’s definitely going to have to keep an eye on you,” he winked. Uriel elbowed Raphael in the head. “Ow! What?” Raphael said looking up at Uriel. I giggled finding their banter funny. Last was Michael who was breathtakingly beautiful with his long wavy dark brown hair. He bowed to me formally as he then  looked up at me with his eyes of blue specked with gold. I was entranced in their beauty as he spoke. 
“It is a pleasure little miss,” he smiled. “We’ll have fun don’t worry,” he winked as Father broke the entrancement with saying there was Gabriel who was away at the time and I would meet him soon. I curtseyed saying it was nice to meet them all. Father and I then departed from them, as we continued on with our day. After my nourishment break Father then took me to one of the many lush green gardens. When we entered I saw Uriel was standing with another under a large oak tree that was in the center of the gardens. The two looked like tall statues of night and day standing there. Uriel with his black, silken hair and the other with his flowing white blonde locks. They had been conversing when they caught sight of me and Father. They both stopped and bowed to their Lord as we then approached them. I then saw the white blonde haired angel glance at me then quickly look away like it pained him to even look at me. This was Gabriel, and I confirmed quickly in my mind that Gabriel did not like me. What I did not know was that Gabriel was close to my mother and knew the violence behind my creation. Father then stroked my hair as he told me he has some business to discuss with Gabriel, and that Uriel would watch over me till he return. I nodded as watched them leave.  
“Come, little one, would you like to hear a story?” Uriel said. I looked up to Uriel as tears started to well in my eyes. Uriel came closer to embrace me in his arms. “My, my what is wrong?”
“Father…”
“Your Father is an important man and sometimes he can not take you everywhere, and my has our Lord spoiled you.” I pulled away from him wiping away my budding tears with the back of my hand. 
“ So would you like to hear a story?” Uriel asked again with a smile. I nodded as he took my hand. We found a lovely spot under the large oak tree. “You know about the human’s right?” Uriel asked like he was testing me. 
“Yes, Father showed me them.”
“They are quite fascinating hmm?”
I looked down coyly playing with the hem of my dress. “A bit…” I said as I felt Uriel  brush my hair back. He then whispered in my ear as I suddenly froze. Flashes of clashing swords, then slaughtered angels crossed my vision. 
“Aye?” I blinked coming out of my vision surprised to see Father had returned for me. “Father!” I smiled as I rose up to embrace him. 
“Oh you missed me so much, was Uriel that bad? “No,” I said looking up at Father's adoring face. I turned to Uriel. “Thank you, Uriel; I enjoyed my time with you.” 
 “It’s been my pleasure dear,” he said as he rose to his feet. He then nodded his head to Father. “It is done my Lord.” Father then reached out to Uriel gripping him on the shoulder. “Thank you Uriel.” Father said. I wondered what that was about when Father then looked down at me and smiled brightly. “Care to accompany me on the rest of my daily duties my lady?” 
I curtsied formally to him. “It be my pleasure my Lord.”
Father chuckled. “Very nice.” I looked up at him and smiled proudly. That was all I wanted was Father to be proud of me. His approval was everything to me. I accompanied Father on his duties once again as we walked down the large marbled halls. We paused as we reached some stairs that lead down. I froze knowing I was to never leave this level of the tower. Why I was never allowed to leave this level of the tower I did not know. I often wondered what existed outside these walls.  Father must have sensed  my nervousness as I heard his chuckle. “It is okay,” Father said giving my hand a squeeze. “As long as I am with you this is okay.” I looked up at Father unsure, but he just smiled as gave my hand another 
squeeze as we headed down the stairs. We reached the bottom level, and continued our walk down the now grey stone corridor. The lower levels of the tower were not as greatly crafted as the upper levels that were of shiny marble stone. We then came to the end of the hall which opened up onto what were the guards training grounds. The grounds spilled out like a round forest arena. This was where Father’s soldiers trained and spared with each other. I watched these angels as they spared with the clank of their swords, metal against metal till something caught my eye as I saw three strangely dressed male angels striding towards us. Known as Father’s Elite Guards they were dressed quite differently from the traditional robes. They wore black high collared Asian style tunics that were trimmed in gold along the edges of their tunic. A black belt cinched at their waists as they wore black leg coverings, and shiny black boots. One was fair blonde, the other had copper colored curly locks, and the last had dark ebony hair. They all had their hair length groomed handsomely short too which was unique for an angel as well. They stopped in front of us as all three bowed. I attached myself to Father’s side hiding behind his robes as the dark haired one looked up and spoke. 
“Your orders have been fulfilled my Lord,” 
“Thank you Pio we can discuss this further when a certain young lady is not present.” I looked up at Father concerned, was I in his way? Father just smiled down at me as he stroked my hair soothing me to know everything was alright. “This is my newest by the way.”
“A little attached my Lord?” The blonde one said, looking up with a slight smirk. 
“Yes indeed and I of her,” Father chuckled. I saw the dark-haired one Father called Pio come over as he knelt down to me. “I’m Pio, nice to meet you,” he smiled as he offered his hand. I looked at him, wide-eyed as he actually spoke to me sincerely! He was not obligated like the others to introduce himself  to me. I then heard Father clear his throat as I let go of his side, and did the proper lady thing. I curtsied to him. “Such a proper Princess,” he smiled.
“I am NOT!” I scoffed and kicked his shin.  I cringed as I felt Father's hands come crashing down on my shoulders tightly. I was in for it now.
“It’s okay,” Pio said rubbing his shin, with a slight grimace on his face. 
“Yeah, Pio has that effect on the females,” grinned the copper-haired one. 
Pio glared back at him, “Shut up!” 
 I then threw myself into his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck. I felt him stiffen a bit; I knew I surprised him…in fact I surprised us both with this bold action of mine. “I’m Sorry!” I cried as I buried my face in his neck to stop the tears I felt brewing. He unwrapped my arms from around him, but did not let go of my hands as he held them to his chest. “It's okay my lady,” he smiled gently as he then kissed my hands. “You’ll be hard to forget,” he winked then smiled again. I felt Father's hands on my shoulders again, softer this time.
“We should take our leave now, thank you all,” he said as he nodded to them. We then left retuning to our upper levels. I think it was determined by your rank which level of the tower you resided in. This was just my theory though as I wondered if I asked Father about my theory would he answer me? I knew he had to be upset with me. I do not know what came over me! I tried act like nothing happened.
“ Um… he was nice, Father.”
“Then why did you kick him, my daughter?” 
I winced, yep he was not happy. I bowed my head looking at the floor. 
“I don’t know…I… sometimes…well Raphael called me Princess.” 
“You need to control these outbursts of yours. A daughter of mine will not act out in such violence.”  
“Kill him!” 
  I gasped as a pain hit my chest. I fell to my hand and knees my heart pounding in my chest. 
 “Aye!” Father’s voice boomed as he shook me. I blinked , and everything was gone. “Did I do something wrong Father?” I asked wondering why Father had me in his grip so tight. Why did he look so worried? He just pulled me tight to him.  “Nothing I just love you my daughter, my sweet child.” I embraced Father back hoping to dismay the concern that was in his heart. To be honest though I was concerned as well. What was happening to me?
 “Can I play with them Father?” I asked.
“I am sorry Aye you can not. You must stay here at home with me.” My heart saddened as I started to feel tears well up.
“Would you like to go into the gardens and see the animals next?”
“Animals?” I said looking up at him with interest as I wiped my budding tears away. Father smiled I’m sure that he had managed to stop an onslaught of tears as he took my hand, and we went to see the animals next. I knew that Father’s wish was for me was to be happy, and I was. Except I  heard the hushed toned  whispers that the others whispered about me when I walked down the marbled halls with Father. “Did you hear?”
“She had our Lord under her spell!”
“I heard she could kill us all.”
What did all that mean? Was there something wrong with me?  I knew I was to never leave the tower, and I never really interacted with anyone else, but Father and the red curls angel. My dreams were often dark too. In my dreams I stood in battlefield of dead angels. Broken wings, blood everywhere… and I liked it. I then shook these thoughts out of my head telling no one. 


*** *** ***
One day Father had cut our daily lessons short as he introduced me to his assistants. Father made sure I was dressed in my most presentable dress of white with a pink ribbon sash. I was always dressed secretly in a dress that had some sort of  pink or red color in it. This was to represent without uttering a word whom I secretly belonged to, and red was the color representation of my Mother who sat on the heavenly council. Father, and I walked down the grand marbled halls. As we passed the large arch windows the blue skies beckoned to me. I always wondered what lurked outside these marbled walls I always tied to. I was either close by Father’s side, or I was handed over to the angel with long red curls. I  wondered why I had to see her all the time. Father said she liked me, that I was special. It had been a long time since a young angel such as myself roamed the tower halls. This answer was not to my satisfactory, but I accepted it. If Father said to spend time with her I obeyed though a bit begrudgingly. Not that she was horrible. She was often kind letting me comb her long red curls and adorn them with white wild flowers that grew in the gardens. I came out of my thoughts as we approached a row of male angel’s line up in a row to greet us. They all bowed in unison as Father approached. It was then that one stepped forward, and knelt down on one knee before me. He smiled with his long straight hair that looked like ebony silk tied in a queue. His eyes were a pale autumn brown and amber. This was Uriel. 
“Hello it’s a pleasure to have a young one running around the tower again,” he said. 
“There will be no running,” Father boomed correcting him. I winced a bit knowing that correction was aimed at me. Next  was Raphael, who was to be my teacher; I was to become a healer like him. Raphael knelt down on one knee to me as well. He smiled with ambient joy in his eyes of aquamarine that sparkled brightly against his fair skin and pale blonde colored hair. “Hello Princess, are you not sweetly beautiful? Father’s definitely going to have to keep an eye on you,” he winked. Uriel elbowed Raphael in the head. “Ow! What?” Raphael said looking up at Uriel. I giggled finding their banter funny. Last was Michael who was breathtakingly beautiful with his long wavy dark brown hair. He bowed to me formally as he then  looked up at me with his eyes of blue specked with gold. I was entranced in their beauty as he spoke. 
“It is a pleasure little miss,” he smiled. “We’ll have fun don’t worry,” he winked as Father broke the entrancement with saying there was Gabriel who was away at the time and I would meet him soon. I curtseyed saying it was nice to meet them all. Father and I then departed from them, as we continued on with our day. After my nourishment break Father then took me to one of the many lush green gardens. When we entered I saw Uriel was standing with another under a large oak tree that was in the center of the gardens. The two looked like tall statues of night and day standing there. Uriel with his black, silken hair and the other with his flowing white blonde locks. They had been conversing when they caught sight of me and Father. They both stopped and bowed to their Lord as we then approached them. I then saw the white blonde haired angel glance at me then quickly look away like it pained him to even look at me. This was Gabriel, and I confirmed quickly in my mind that Gabriel did not like me. What I did not know was that Gabriel was close to my mother and knew the violence behind my creation. Father then stroked my hair as he told me he has some business to discuss with Gabriel, and that Uriel would watch over me till he return. I nodded as watched them leave.  
“Come, little one, would you like to hear a story?” Uriel said. I looked up to Uriel as tears started to well in my eyes. Uriel came closer to embrace me in his arms. “My, my what is wrong?”
“Father…”
“Your Father is an important man and sometimes he can not take you everywhere, and my has our Lord spoiled you.” I pulled away from him wiping away my budding tears with the back of my hand. 
“ So would you like to hear a story?” Uriel asked again with a smile. I nodded as he took my hand. We found a lovely spot under the large oak tree. “You know about the human’s right?” Uriel asked like he was testing me. 
“Yes, Father showed me them.”
“They are quite fascinating hmm?”
I looked down coyly playing with the hem of my dress. “A bit…” I said as I felt Uriel  brush my hair back. He then whispered in my ear as I suddenly froze. Flashes of clashing swords, then slaughtered angels crossed my vision. 
“Aye?” I blinked coming out of my vision surprised to see Father had returned for me. “Father!” I smiled as I rose up to embrace him. 
“Oh you missed me so much, was Uriel that bad? “No,” I said looking up at Father's adoring face. I turned to Uriel. “Thank you, Uriel; I enjoyed my time with you.” 
 “It’s been my pleasure dear,” he said as he rose to his feet. He then nodded his head to Father. “It is done my Lord.” Father then reached out to Uriel gripping him on the shoulder. “Thank you Uriel.” Father said. I wondered what that was about when Father then looked down at me and smiled brightly. “Care to accompany me on the rest of my daily duties my lady?” 
I curtsied formally to him. “It be my pleasure my Lord.”
Father chuckled. “Very nice.” I looked up at him and smiled proudly. That was all I wanted was Father to be proud of me. His approval was everything to me. I accompanied Father on his duties once again as we walked down the large marbled halls. We paused as we reached some stairs that lead down. I froze knowing I was to never leave this level of the tower. Why I was never allowed to leave this level of the tower I did not know. I often wondered what existed outside these walls.  Father must have sensed  my nervousness as I heard his chuckle. “It is okay,” Father said giving my hand a squeeze. “As long as I am with you this is okay.” I looked up at Father unsure, but he just smiled as gave my hand another 
squeeze as we headed down the stairs. We reached the bottom level, and continued our walk down the now grey stone corridor. The lower levels of the tower were not as greatly crafted as the upper levels that were of shiny marble stone. We then came to the end of the hall which opened up onto what were the guards training grounds. The grounds spilled out like a round forest arena. This was where Father’s soldiers trained and spared with each other. I watched these angels as they spared with the clank of their swords, metal against metal till something caught my eye as I saw three strangely dressed male angels striding towards us. Known as Father’s Elite Guards they were dressed quite differently from the traditional robes. They wore black high collared Asian style tunics that were trimmed in gold along the edges of their tunic. A black belt cinched at their waists as they wore black leg coverings, and shiny black boots. One was fair blonde, the other had copper colored curly locks, and the last had dark ebony hair. They all had their hair length groomed handsomely short too which was unique for an angel as well. They stopped in front of us as all three bowed. I attached myself to Father’s side hiding behind his robes as the dark haired one looked up and spoke. 
“Your orders have been fulfilled my Lord,” 
“Thank you Pio we can discuss this further when a certain young lady is not present.” I looked up at Father concerned, was I in his way? Father just smiled down at me as he stroked my hair soothing me to know everything was alright. “This is my newest by the way.”
“A little attached my Lord?” The blonde one said, looking up with a slight smirk. 
“Yes indeed and I of her,” Father chuckled. I saw the dark-haired one Father called Pio come over as he knelt down to me. “I’m Pio, nice to meet you,” he smiled as he offered his hand. I looked at him, wide-eyed as he actually spoke to me sincerely! He was not obligated like the others to introduce himself  to me. I then heard Father clear his throat as I let go of his side, and did the proper lady thing. I curtsied to him. “Such a proper Princess,” he smiled.
“I am NOT!” I scoffed and kicked his shin.  I cringed as I felt Father's hands come crashing down on my shoulders tightly. I was in for it now.
“It’s okay,” Pio said rubbing his shin, with a slight grimace on his face. 
“Yeah, Pio has that effect on the females,” grinned the copper-haired one. 
Pio glared back at him, “Shut up!” 
 I then threw myself into his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck. I felt him stiffen a bit; I knew I surprised him…in fact I surprised us both with this bold action of mine. “I’m Sorry!” I cried as I buried my face in his neck to stop the tears I felt brewing. He unwrapped my arms from around him, but did not let go of my hands as he held them to his chest. “It's okay my lady,” he smiled gently as he then kissed my hands. “You’ll be hard to forget,” he winked then smiled again. I felt Father's hands on my shoulders again, softer this time.
“We should take our leave now, thank you all,” he said as he nodded to them. We then left retuning to our upper levels. I think it was determined by your rank which level of the tower you resided in. This was just my theory though as I wondered if I asked Father about my theory would he answer me? I knew he had to be upset with me. I do not know what came over me! I tried act like nothing happened.
“ Um… he was nice, Father.”
“Then why did you kick him, my daughter?” 
I winced, yep he was not happy. I bowed my head looking at the floor. 
“I don’t know…I… sometimes…well Raphael called me Princess.” 
“You need to control these outbursts of yours. A daughter of mine will not act out in such violence.”  
“Kill him!” 
  I gasped as a pain hit my chest. I fell to my hand and knees my heart pounding in my chest. 
 “Aye!” Father’s voice boomed as he shook me. I blinked , and everything was gone. “Did I do something wrong Father?” I asked wondering why Father had me in his grip so tight. Why did he look so worried? He just pulled me tight to him.  “Nothing I just love you my daughter, my sweet child.” I embraced Father back hoping to dismay the concern that was in his heart. To be honest though I was concerned as well. What was happening to me?

     

 

 

 

 “Can I play with them Father?” I asked.
“I am sorry Aye you can not. You must stay here at home with me.” My heart saddened as I started to feel tears well up.
“Would you like to go into the gardens and see the animals next?”
“Animals?” I said looking up at him with interest as I wiped my budding tears away. Father smiled I’m sure that he had managed to stop an onslaught of tears as he took my hand, and we went to see the animals next. I knew that Father’s wish was for me was to be happy, and I was. Except I  heard the hushed toned  whispers that the others whispered about me when I walked down the marbled halls with Father. “Did you hear?”
“She had our Lord under her spell!”
“I heard she could kill us all.”
What did all that mean? Was there something wrong with me?  I knew I was to never leave the tower, and I never really interacted with anyone else, but Father and the red curls angel. My dreams were often dark too. In my dreams I stood in battlefield of dead angels. Broken wings, blood everywhere… and I liked it. I then shook these thoughts out of my head telling no one. 
Angelic Confessions Excerpt

 

 

 Soon my studies started as I was to learn the history, and etiquette in how to be a proper angel. I obeyed Father totally and completely without thought: he was Father. I had my growing fascination with the humans which Father humored letting me look down on them as a reward at the end of lessons. I particularly liked watching the children.“Can I play with them Father?” I asked.“I am sorry Aye you can not. You must stay here at home with me.” My heart saddened as I started to feel tears well up.“Would you like to go into the gardens and see the animals next?”

“Animals?” I said looking up at him with interest as I wiped my budding tears away. Father smiled I’m sure that he had managed to stop an onslaught of tears as he took my hand, and we went to see the animals next. I knew that Father’s wish was for me was to be happy, and I was. Except I  heard the hushed toned  whispers that the others whispered about me when I walked down the marbled halls with Father. “Did you hear?”
“She had our Lord under her spell!”
“I heard she could kill us all.”
What did all that mean? Was there something wrong with me?  I knew I was to never leave the tower, and I never really interacted with anyone else, but Father and the red curls angel. My dreams were often dark too. In my dreams I stood in battlefield of dead angels. Broken wings, blood everywhere… and I liked it. I then shook these thoughts out of my head telling no one. 

 “Animals?” I said looking up at him with interest as I wiped my budding tears away. Father smiled I’m sure that he had managed to stop an onslaught of tears as he took my hand, and we went to see the animals next. I knew that Father’s wish was for me was to be happy, and I was. Except I  heard the hushed toned  whispers that the others whispered about me when I walked down the marbled halls with Father. “Did you hear?”

“She had our Lord under her spell!”
“I heard she could kill us all.”
What did all that mean? Was there something wrong with me?  I knew I was to never leave the tower, and I never really interacted with anyone else, but Father and the red curls angel. My dreams were often dark too. In my dreams I stood in battlefield of dead angels. Broken wings, blood everywhere… and I liked it. I then shook these thoughts out of my head telling no one. 
“She had our Lord under her spell!”
“I heard she could kill us all.”
 
What did all that mean? Was there something wrong with me?  I knew I was to never leave the tower, and I never really interacted with anyone else, but Father and the red curls angel. My dreams were often dark too. In my dreams I stood in battlefield of dead angels. Broken wings, blood everywhere… and I liked it. I then shook these thoughts out of my head telling no one. 
  ** *** ***
 
One day Father had cut our daily lessons short as he introduced me to his assistants. Father made sure I was dressed in my most presentable dress of white with a pink ribbon sash. I was always dressed secretly in a dress that had some sort of  pink or red color in it. This was to represent without uttering a word whom I secretly belonged to, and red was the color representation of my Mother who sat on the heavenly council. Father, and I walked down the grand marbled halls. As we passed the large arch windows the blue skies beckoned to me. I always wondered what lurked outside these marbled walls I always tied to. I was either close by Father’s side, or I was handed over to the angel with long red curls. I  wondered why I had to see her all the time. Father said she liked me, that I was special. It had been a long time since a young angel such as myself roamed the tower halls. This answer was not to my satisfactory, but I accepted it. If Father said to spend time with her I obeyed though a bit begrudgingly. Not that she was horrible. She was often kind letting me comb her long red curls and adorn them with white wild flowers that grew in the gardens. I came out of my thoughts as we approached a row of male angel’s line up in a row to greet us. They all bowed in unison as Father approached. It was then that one stepped forward, and knelt down on one knee before me. He smiled with his long straight hair that looked like ebony silk tied in a queue. His eyes were a pale autumn brown and amber. This was Uriel. 
“Hello it’s a pleasure to have a young one running around the tower again,” he said. 
 
"There will be no running,” Father boomed correcting him. I winced a bit knowing that correction was aimed at me. Next  was Raphael, who was to be my teacher; I was to become a healer like him. Raphael knelt down on one knee to me as well. He smiled with ambient joy in his eyes of aquamarine that sparkled brightly against his fair skin and pale blonde colored hair. “Hello Princess, are you not sweetly beautiful? Father’s definitely going to have to keep an eye on you,” he winked. Uriel elbowed Raphael in the head. “Ow! What?” Raphael said looking up at Uriel. I giggled finding their banter funny. Last was Michael who was breathtakingly beautiful with his long wavy dark brown hair. He bowed to me formally as he then  looked up at me with his eyes of blue specked with gold. I was entranced in their beauty as he spoke.
"It is a pleasure little miss,” he smiled. “We’ll have fun don’t worry,” he winked as Father broke the entrancement with saying there was Gabriel who was away at the time and I would meet him soon. I curtsied saying it was nice to meet them all. Father and I then departed from them, as we continued on with our day. After my nourishment break Father then took me to one of the many lush green gardens. When we entered I saw Uriel was standing with another under a large oak tree that was in the center of the gardens. The two looked like tall statues of night and day standing there. Uriel with his black, silken hair and the other with his flowing white blonde locks. They had been conversing when they caught sight of me and Father. They both stopped and bowed to their Lord as we then approached them. I then saw the white blonde haired angel glance at me then quickly look away like it pained him to even look at me. This was Gabriel, and I confirmed quickly in my mind that Gabriel did not like me. What I did not know was that Gabriel was close to my mother and knew the violence behind my creation. Father then stroked my hair as he told me he has some business to discuss with Gabriel, and that Uriel would watch over me till he return. I nodded as watched them leave.  
"Come, little one, would you like to hear a story?” Uriel said. I looked up to Uriel as tears started to well in my eyes. Uriel came closer to embrace me in his arms. “My, my what is wrong?”
“Father…”
“Your Father is an important man and sometimes he can not take you everywhere, and my has our Lord spoiled you.” I pulled away from him wiping away my budding tears with the back of my hand.
“ So would you like to hear a story?” Uriel asked again with a smile. I nodded as he took my hand. We found a lovely spot under the large oak tree. “You know about the human’s right?” Uriel asked like he was testing me.
“Yes, Father showed me them.”
“They are quite fascinating hmm?”
I looked down coyly playing with the hem of my dress. “A bit…” I said as I felt Uriel  brush my hair back. He then whispered in my ear as I suddenly froze. Flashes of clashing swords, then slaughtered angels crossed my vision.
“Aye?” I blinked coming out of my vision surprised to see Father had returned for me. “Father!” I smiled as I rose up to embrace him. 
 
"Oh you missed me so much, was Uriel that bad? “No,” I said looking up at Father's adoring face. I turned to Uriel. “Thank you, Uriel; I enjoyed my time with you.”
 “It’s been my pleasure dear,” he said as he rose to his feet. He then nodded his head to Father. “It is done my Lord.” Father then reached out to Uriel gripping him on the shoulder. “Thank you Uriel.” Father said. I wondered what that was about when Father then looked down at me and smiled brightly. “Care to accompany me on the rest of my daily duties my lady?” I curtsied formally to him. “It be my pleasure my Lord.”
Father chuckled. “Very nice.” I looked up at him and smiled proudly. That was all I wanted was Father to be proud of me. His approval was everything to me. I accompanied Father on his duties once again as we walked down the large marbled halls. We paused as we reached some stairs that lead down. I froze knowing I was to never leave this level of the tower. Why I was never allowed to leave this level of the tower I did not know. I often wondered what existed outside these walls.  Father must have sensed  my nervousness as I heard his chuckle. “It is okay,” Father said giving my hand a squeeze. “As long as I am with you this is okay.” I looked up at Father unsure, but he just smiled as gave my hand another squeeze as we headed down the stairs. We reached the bottom level, and continued our walk down the now grey stone corridor. The lower levels of the tower were not as greatly crafted as the upper levels that were of shiny marble stone. We then came to the end of the hall which opened up onto what were the guards training grounds. The grounds spilled out like a round forest arena. This was where Father’s soldiers trained and spared with each other. I watched these angels as they spared with the clank of their swords, metal against metal till something caught my eye as I saw three strangely dressed male angels striding towards us. Known as Father’s Elite Guards they were dressed quite differently from the traditional robes. They wore black high collared Asian style tunics that were trimmed in gold along the edges of their tunic. A black belt cinched at their waists as they wore black leg coverings, and shiny black boots. One was fair blonde, the other had copper colored curly locks, and the last had dark ebony hair. They all had their hair length groomed handsomely short too which was unique for an angel as well. They stopped in front of us as all three bowed. I attached myself to Father’s side hiding behind his robes as the dark haired one looked up and spoke. “Your orders have been fulfilled my Lord,”
“Thank you Pio we can discuss this further when a certain young lady is not present.” I looked up at Father concerned, was I in his way? Father just smiled down at me as he stroked my hair soothing me to know everything was alright. “This is my newest by the way.”
“A little attached my Lord?” The blonde one said, looking up with a slight smirk.
“Yes indeed and I of her,” Father chuckled. I saw the dark-haired one Father called Pio come over as he knelt down to me. “I’m Pio, nice to meet you,” he smiled as he offered his hand. I looked at him, wide-eyed as he actually spoke to me sincerely! He was not obligated like the others to introduce himself  to me. I then heard Father clear his throat as I let go of his side, and did the proper lady thing. I curtsied to him. “Such a proper Princess,” he smiled.
“I am NOT!” I scoffed and kicked his shin.  I cringed as I felt Father's hands come crashing down on my shoulders tightly. I was in for it now.
“It’s okay,” Pio said rubbing his shin, with a slight grimace on his face.
“Yeah, Pio has that effect on the females,” grinned the copper-haired one.
Pio glared back at him, “Shut up!”
I then threw myself into his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck. I felt him stiffen a bit; I knew I surprised him…in fact I surprised us both with this bold action of mine. “I’m Sorry!” I cried as I buried my face in his neck to stop the tears I felt brewing. He unwrapped my arms from around him, but did not let go of my hands as he held them to his chest. “It's okay my lady,” he smiled gently as he then kissed my hands. “You’ll be hard to forget,” he winked then smiled again. I felt Father's hands on my shoulders again, softer this time.
“We should take our leave now, thank you all,” he said as he nodded to them. We then left retuning to our upper levels. I think it was determined by your rank which level of the tower you resided in. This was just my theory though as I wondered if I asked Father about my theory would he answer me? I knew he had to be upset with me. I do not know what came over me! I tried act like nothing happened. “ Um… he was nice, Father.”
“Then why did you kick him, my daughter?” I winced, yep he was not happy. I bowed my head looking at the floor.
“I don’t know…I… sometimes…well Raphael called me Princess.”
“You need to control these outbursts of yours. A daughter of mine will not act out in such violence.”  
“Kill him!”   I gasped as a pain hit my chest. I fell to my hand and knees my heart pounding in my chest.
 “Aye!” Father’s voice boomed as he shook me. I blinked , and everything was gone. “Did I do something wrong Father?” I asked wondering why Father had me in his grip so tight. Why did he look so worried? He just pulled me tight to him.  “Nothing I just love you my daughter, my sweet child.” I embraced Father back hoping to dismay the concern that was in his heart. To be honest though I was concerned as well. What was happening to me?